Acceptance, Love, and Happiness
Happy Earth Day, friends! I hope you are doing something to help you feel more connected to the Earth today. Remember we are all made from the Earth so even if you just take some time for introspection and a little gratitude, those happy vibes will generate out to the Earth, making it a happier place to be. With that said, I think I should have been born in the 70's. I am so turning into a free spirit, man, as I get older.
Speaking of, here is a lovely video that is a little psychedelic and totally appropriate for Earth Day. Warning: smiling and happiness are potential side effects. Click here if you dare.
The last few days I have had a lot on my mind that I have been wanting to get down in writing, er, typing. I've realized that I was the kind of kid who liked to fit in. I am sure I am not alone in that but I was one of those kids. I definitely had some "weird" things that I rolled with (like being an astrology nerd and a goody-goody choir-girl priss) that I took pride in but some others that I hid away. I think music taste is definitely one of the things I have ongoing periods of embarrassment with. In college there was a time when I tried to be on top of the lastest "indie" music and be hip and cool. I found it to be exhausting even thinking about it. It was work, not fun for me. In the last couple of years I have gradually more accepted that I do not have "cool" music taste. I don't even know if I know what that entails. I will admit it, I used to like Hanson. I could still sing most of the words to "MmmmBop". I also admit I am a huge Britney fan. I still catch myself saying that in an ashamed way, when really I should just say it and not give a f*ck.
I think that acceptance is ongoing for sure, but I really think that over this past decade, my twenties, has really helped me grow a lot in this area. As I think about turning 30 in less than 3 months, I realize more and more that the girl I was when I was 20 is so different than the woman I am today (haha, "I'm not a girl... not yet a woman..." *sigh, dork alert!*). I think the two biggest relationships that have shown this maturity is my relationship with Tyler (we are such great grown ups to one another) and my relationships at work.
One of the things I love most about Tyler is how we do not take one another for granted. I once dated this guy who told me that we didn't need to use manners when talking with one another because please & thank you are implied. WHAT?!? Tyler does not have this philosophy, thank goodness. We say please and thank you. We say "I appreciate you" and we say why. When we argue we try to remain calm and reasonable. If we're too heated we take a breath or a break and re-visit when we have cooled down. This relationship is not perfect by any means but I believe it one that is based on mutual respect and is on a level playing field. We're equals and make one another better. We're a power couple, fo sho.
At work, I have really grown in confidence and my ability to lead. I facilitate groups and classes on a regular basis. My master's degree has actually made me a smarter person (at least the student loans were worth it, eh?)! I have great relationships with colleagues and really feel like I have become a part of my organization. I cannot believe I have been there for almost a decade, a full third of my life. Kind of crazy huh?
I do think that the part I want to work on is loving and accepting myself SO much that it doesn't matter what others think. I can defend my love for Britney now and still be a bit of a hippie, things I am proud of and don't care if others like it. What I still struggle with is how sensitive I am.
People are mean. There, I said it. I think as a species we are not very nice, probably mostly due to survival and a way of cut throat living that had to happen at various points throughout history (I am not sure they had to happen, but they did). It is harder to be nice. I think people maybe see it as a sign of weakness? I know I have told myself "Grow thicker skin" or "Be tough" but I am not sure what good that really does. Sure it stops me from crying (maybe) but I am not sure we need tougher people in this world.
I remember when reading Harry Potter and finding out the reason why he is so much more powerful than Voldemort (yep, I am a NERD. We've covered this, yes?) is because of his capacity to LOVE. I am sure there were many people that were like, WTF? How trite, how lame, how cheesy, right? I thought that too. But J.K. Rowling is no fool. She knows that the world, more than anything else, needs more love and compassion.
So I ask you to work on you, work on loving you, and hopefully that will in turn make you more loving towards others. If you are grumpy and a curmudgeon (or you just like to smile and dance like me), then here are 3 more songs I love to listen to in order to make me happy:
"Canned Heat" by Jamiroquai I cannot listen to this song without dancing or smiling. The boogie is for real, yo.
"Till the World Ends" by Britney Spears I already loved this song before it became the theme song of our wedding reception, in my mind. This was the first song that played during the dance party portion of the reception and it makes me smile from ear to ear thinking about my girls dancing with me. PLUS I love the whole concept. Promise me that when the world comes to an end, you will keep dancing, k? Promise me. Say no to fear, and yes to dancing.
"Castle" by Macklemore Okay this song is for the "freaks" as Macklemore says. It's vulgar and SO hilarious! It's fun to run too as well. I look like a weirdo I am sure with a ridiculous smile on my face but you know, my favorite way to run is with a smile on my face.